I Hate The Free Credit Report.com Guys
78Eric Violette-The Leader of the Free Credit Report Cult
The Commercials Suck You In And There Is No Escape!
Once you hear a FreeCreditReport.com song, it's all over for you. It's stuck in your head-forever to remain there like a bad dream. It will never leave you. The catchy tunes following a guy with the poorest credit in town will attach itself to your brain, much like a barnacle attaches itself to the hull of a ship. There is no cure.
When these commercials began making their way to my television set awhile back, I thought it was just a passing fad and the pirates singing about having piss poor credit (the reason they were dressed as pirates serving tourists in t-shirts) would disappear quickly from the airwaves. I was wrong. The Free Credit Report guys have become some of the biggest, most recognizable stars on American television.
Something worries me about these guys. They may have been involved with a murder. Please continue reading to find out how I came to this conclusion.
The Free Credit Report Ad That Started it All
The Free Credit Report.com Band is a Cult
Sure, the first ad (the pirate commercial) was cute and the tune was catchy, but little did I realize I would be sucked into the cult following of the FreeCreditReport.com band and follow the commercials like a schoolgirl glued to the radio waiting for the next Jonas Brothers hit.
Take My Wife......Please!
Stuck in The Basement With You!
The second commercial for the credit report company, involved a guy who married a girl with horrible credit. Finances force the couple to live in her parents basement which (according to the commercial), made it impossible to own a dog and have a yard. Why credit history wasn't discussed before the marriage, I'm not sure. It doesn't matter now, though, because the singer and his band are forced to practice in one small room. The poor drummer is forced to set up in the bathroom and each time the wife passes through with the laundry basket, she closes the bathroom door on the poor guy. The wife with the bad credit has an attitude to match. Well, let that be a lesson to them. If only they'd gone to FreeCreditReport.com in the first place, they could be happy, free (and best of all) single. Now they're stuck in basement hell for all eternity-or are they? This was the turning report for the FreeCreditReport.com guys. I discovered that they're holding a deep, dark secret. These guys are more dangerous than the Manson family ever was.
My Credit is Whack
Where'd The Mrs. Go?
Shortly after band practice in the basement, we see our heros out to buy a new car. This is the band's first attempt at rap-and what a poor attempt it is. The song is horrible and so is the vehicle the singer is forced to purchase as the result of having a credit score lower than his self-esteem.
One may notice that from this commercial forward that the wife has disappeared. No mention is made of her from the last commercial on.
Has anyone called the police? I bet I know who played a part in the woman's disappearance. It's the husband, I bet the body is in a Hefty bag in the small, cramped basement. After all, there's no room in the trunk of the sub compact. She's dead-and those bastards did it. I know it! I think America's Most Wanted would be most interested in this case.
Check It Out-Gas Prices Going Up Sky High
Now I'm Riding Eco-Friendly, But I Still Look Phat!
Over last summer when gas prices in the US (and the rest of the world for that matter) went up sky high, our leader traded in his subcompact for a two wheeled drive. It's no surprise that when the owner of the bike store sees the young man's credit report, he is sold the crappiest two wheeler in the store.
In the song, the singer insists the reason he traded in his vehicle was high gas prices, but how are we really sure that this is the case? Suppose he killed his wife in the car and then left her in the basement. Or maybe it was the other way around and he knocked her off in the basement and got rid of the body using the car. I think he is trying to hide incriminating DNA evidence from the police. These guys are beginning to scare me.
Now we know his credit wasn't the only thing that was whacked.
Now I'm Founding Out How Bad Reality Hurts
When You're a Rock Star-You Get To Party Hard
Ok, I believe the bike was stolen. I say this, because it's no where to be found at the rock star party. This guy couldn't afford a lock for it, anyway. Maybe he pawned the bike to buy the shirt and tie. Either way it doesn't matter. The bike's gone and we're back to rapping. I didn't like this song when I first heard it, but like all the others, it grew on me like a hairy mole.These murderers need to stop rapping and turn themselves in.
Renaissance Faire
Since We First Showed Up With Our Pirate Hats On
Well, well, well. What do we have here? Our band is on the run from the law and now they're hiding out at the renaissance faire.
Who's going to find them there? No one, that's who. It's a perfect place to hide. No on goes to those stupid faires where you pretend you're an English Knight about to go into battle.
Ok, I've said what I think is important to say. Take my word for it that The Free Credit Report.com guys brutally murdered the singer's wife. I don't know if it was the bad credit discovery that was her undoing, or something else. Maybe the drummer killed her for closing the door in his face one too many times.
The world may never know.
READING THIS HUB DOES NOT REQUIRE ENROLLMENT IN TRIPLE ADVANTAGE.
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CommentsLoading...
You are screwed for life now, Goldentoad. Once the songs get in, they don't leave again-ever.
Thanks for the comment:)
Well rockinjoe I just got one thing to say. Thank God I live in Australia.
Now I'm gonna take my hard drive out and beat the crap out of it in case those ads gave me an infection. (spit ) (spit).
Well constructed Hub though!
It gets worse rockin joe! I read something about these commercials. First off, the guy isn't singing. That's somebody else's voice. Second, the dude is French Canadian and he speaks with a French accent. Third, freecreditreport.com is NOT FREE! That's right. If you sign up and pay for one year, you get one month free. (Plus, getting credit reports is terrible for your credit, since it looks to lenders as though you are trying to get credit everywhere because your credit report has been accessed so many times.)
It's a sham, and you deserve to be commendated for pointing out--in addition to all this other stuff--the commercials are also stupid!
Thanks for the great hub!
F-R-E-E that spells free-thanks for writing this hub for me! Damn song is stuck forever! Another gem of a hub rockinjoe.
LOL! I have seen the commercial and will now view as a mini-drama series. Very creative, you are.
Christoph: If you request a credit report for yourself it won't affect your score or lenders will see that you have viewed it, its only if someone else requests the report. I have a membership with a credit service as I like to monitor my credit, but I view it online.
Good for you agvulpes. Consider yourself fortunate that you're not subject to the Free Credit Report commercials. But on the other hand, you've still got Paul Hogan.
Thanks for the valuable info, Cristoph. I had read about the fraud last summer and I appreciate your bringing it up. So what you're saying is, we have a French Canadien with an accent who can't sing, who could possibly be involved with murdering his wife and may be out of the country as I write this? Time to notify the Royal Mounted Police and possibly INTERPOL.
Hi Jim. Thanks for the comment. I'm glad you liked the hub. I think they're very educational as well. F R E E-That spells FREE. It's like an adult version of Sesame Street,
Hi VioletSun. You're awesome. Thanks for your comment. Don't give these guys any ideas. The next thing you know we'll be seeing them in one of those teen comedy movies. (like Dude, Where's My Car? or Date Movie or something equally horrible) They belong in prison.
LOL! Too cool.
It's obvious you are a former security guard. You've cracked this case--although, I admit I never believed that guy got THAT girl to marry him anyway. I thought she was closing the door to the bathroom and looking at him that way because he is just such a dork--I thought maybe he was really her brother or something. I mean, there he is--obviously a total LOSER--complaining about his gorgeous wife's bad credit--as though a single loser guy on this planet would meet THAT girl and worry about her credit report for one single second. Please! lol!
It's true about them charging you though. I used to work for a bank, and people called all the time to ask, "What this $29.95 on my debit card to Triple Advantage?" They didn't even know what it was. So then I would get to say, "F-r-e-e that spells Free--CreditReport.com Baby!"
Seriously, they never laughed.
The site is so sneaky--it appears as this vague other name in your account. Sometimes people don't even notice for months.
I do like those ads and catchy tunes....LOL
This is the site for free credit report and it is authorized by the government.
Hi Pamela. I'm glad you enjoyed the hub. Nice to get a woman's point of view on this loser. I mean, what's he doing playing with his crappy band when he should be out looking for a job? It's obvious he doesn't help out with the laundry, either. What a creep. And you're right. The wife does look pretty hot.I wonder if he bathes?Fortunately, we've been blessed with great credit and don't have to worry about heading to their website. $29.95? Is that a recurring charge? I'd sure as heck know if that was on my statement. Some people. Geeze!Oh, just to clarify. I wasn't bright enough for security guard, so I became a store detective. Big difference and I don't want to insult any hard-working security guards out there.
Hi countrywomen. Thanks for the comment. Very nice of you. Thank for including the link. I hope people are wise when it comes to decisions concerning their credit scores.
Glad you were able to unload, Mike. I would make one correction. I don't know anything about the actor, but if he is indeed an asshole, I bet he's a rich one:)
Thanks for the comment.
Have you noticed that the same little old lady is following them through every commercial? I think it's actually a cult. Or maybe she's a groupie of the band. Either way, it's kinda creepy. And she always looks really mad.
Thanks for picking up on that B.T. I didn't notice it until you mentioned it. Perhaps she's the cult leader? Or maybe she's the loser's mom. She could be mad because her credit sucks, as well. The mystery deepens.
i love those comericals. my babies love them too
His legs aren't sticking to the vinyl in his used subcompact now. I'm betting he burned it with wifey's corpse in the trunk.
Thanks luvintkandtj. When I was looking for the commercials on YouTube, they had a lot of great videos of kids singing these songs. They were really cute.
Em, you're a genius! You're right. He torched the car and got rid of ALL the evidence. Wow. That's intense. If anyone's looking, I happen to know of a 1 room basement apartment for rent. Don't worry about a credit check, as it doesn't appear to be an issue.
Wow, I didn't know there was such a thing as a store detective. I didn't mean to be insulting or anything, I just never heard of that. What is the difference between those two jobs? What do store detectives do?
God, I should know these things. Especially since I steal Beatles CDs on coccasion.
ROFL! Great hub Joe. :D
I think BT raises a good point, I think this is a cult. All that's missing is for the singer (who isn't really singing) to have some of those contacts that look like hypnotizing screwy eyeballs.
I actually loved the first few commercials, and the very first one was with the guys riding in an old car singing about their butts or legs or something being glued to the vinyl while some hot chicks in a hot car are laughing at them. :D
The one in the basement, with the dude sitting on the toilet is hysterical.
Hi Pamela. The difference between a store detective and a security guard is...hey, wait. That might be a good hub topic. Thanks for the idea!
Those guys are sooooo annoying. Didn't they try and do a rap version? They look like their singing in a very bad lipsyncing contest. And that old lady in the commercials creeps me out.
Thanks Pam. I love that commercial with the subcompact. That's when the car stalls next to the sports car full of hot chicks. That's hysterical. I still like the one with the band practice in the basement. That's my favorite.
Thanks Christine. The old lady creeps me out too. If anyone knows who she is and why she's in these ads, please let us know.
Maybe it is a flashback, but I swear they had another commercial before any of these. And in it they were like sitting in a tree or something like that, I remember thinking oh they ripped off Something about Mary.
Maybe I will solve this mystery first then I will solve the Murder. You know you gotta ramp up to the big cases.
TMG
TheMoneyGuy-That's another mystery that you try to solve-why is that creepy old lady in the commericals!
Christoph - What's wrong with French Canadians? Don't answer that, I already know.
Okay Joe, who's the genius now?? This is brilliant! I seldom watch the vids in hubs, but I watched these and the first one three times - I love it. I hadn't noticed before that the white haired lady was in most of them. Whoever came up with this advertising campaign is probably enjoying a nice big bonus.
Well done and I love the angle you used. I also agree with you that something sinister has taken place. I think you should alert the authorities.
Okay, I'm going to listen to the first vid again on my way out.
Damn you! It won't go away, just keeps playing over and over again in my head!
Hi TMG, I remember seeing a few takeoff commercials on the "Something About Mary Guys" singing in the tree, but I don't remember them being for FreeCreditReport.com. I'll have to scour YouTube and see if there's something I missed. Anything's possible.
Anyone solving the murder will be honored forever in this hub. I hope you can do it.
Shirley, you're a sweetheart. Thank you. I agree. It doesn't matter if you love the ads or hate them, they're addicting as anything.....
Just ask Shirley:)
This is ridiculous!! Two hours have passed and I just found myself singing it under my breath. Take this evil hex off of me, please!
Sorry Shirley. I know it's irritating. I can remove the evil hex, but I'll need a donation in the amount of $25 sent directly to my Paypal account....or the hex stays.
They should start doing a song for banks, no wait, the same rule doesn't apply to them! Yet, they make them. How ironic.
Oh how I wish I had written that song! It's pure eeeeeviiiilll!
Oh, the humanity!! Ya know, Joe, I'm a little short of funds due to Christmas and all. Tiny Tim wants a new cane and Ralphie wants a Red Rider BB gun, so do you think that maybe I could pay you Tuesday for a hex removal today?
I think I can help, Shirley. To remove this particular hex, you need to listen to "If I had a million dollars", by the Barenaked Ladies, for 27 continuous hours. That should take care of it.
Thanks for stopping in, Writer Rider. It's crazy, I know....
The thing is, B.T., anyone of us could have written those tunes. Just think....the writers must have made a fortune on them.
Bugger! I'm not wired that way - you only have to hum a few bars or mention the title and it happens.
Thanks. :(
Hi Shirley. Sorry the hex antidote is so high. I understand your plight with Tiny Tim, but I have a feeling Bob Cratchit's boss is going to come around at the last minute and get Tiny Tim (and everyone else in the family) a TON of gifts. They'll be fine.
As far as Ralphie....DON'T GET HIM THE GUN! He'll break his glasses the first time he shoots it. He'll be more than happy with a pair of pink bunny pajammas with the feet in them. I've been saving up myself to buy a ladies leg lamp. It's wearing fishnets and a high heel.
The leg lamp is in my Christmas gag gifts hub. You can get the matching leg clock. How exciting is that!
Welllll....I have other pressing financial matters that preclude an additional hex removal bill. Mark Knowles wants a deposit on the $10,000 he's going to charge me to fly to Canada to cook me some spaghetti. So you see don't you, that $25 is a little above my means at the moment.
ha ha that's great! I love the leg lamp. My wife saw them at a local pharmacy for sale, but they're cheaper on your hub from Amazon.
Well, enjoy your spaghetti from Mark, but don't forget that the Free Credit Report guy is from Canada. (Quebec, I believe) Maybe the song is in the air up there.
Joe- I recently paid off my car loan so that in case I get married and need to sell I can do a quick sale. But my credit score just went up by 10 points from 760 to 770 (I check it in my free providian credit card score information). I don't know how one can get above 800 score (I have no credit card balances and also only debt was my Civic car which I paid off) off course I have been in US for only last 4 years maybe that goes against me.
Shirley -- I'll come to Canada and cook you spaghetti for only $5,000. Does Mark Knowles make Grandma Castalucci's Marinara Sauce from NY? I do!
I have a theory about this murder mystery. Definitely the drummer did it. He had the biggest beef with the wife. Who, BTW, I never considered hawt or even hot. Her 'tude just bugged me. Yeah, lady, keep fluffing and folding. You little credit liability you. You should be ashamed of yourself.
I think the cult had some help, tho. Has anyone else noticed that the Geico Cavemen have become rather sinister recently? The ad where they get off their motorcycles? I think they came straight from that rap party where our FCR.com boys were serving the drinks. In fact, how do we know that they're not the French Canadian and the drummer in disguise? Hmmm. Don't count out their possible involvement in this scheme.
Hi countrywomen. Thanks again for the comment. Good for you on your score. You and I are just about matched. My wife's score is higher than mine, however. Very strange. You can get above 800 (I believe it goes as high as 850) Actually having no debt can hurt you. If you haven't got any financial obligations currently, that may be working against you....or so I've been told.
Very amusing analysis. Those commercials are annoying and I rarely pay attention, but clever way to explain it all.
Mighty Mom, you just might be right about the FCR/Geico connection. Once again the mystery deepens, I can't imagine the FCR guys being able to pay for car insurance. Maybe they're all part of some giant insurance scam. This is bigger than we all thought. (I've yet to see the GEICO motorcycle commercial, but I'm sure it's only a matter of time.)
Though the wife has (or should I say had) an attitude, she's now a murder victim. I feel bad for her, her parents and the now very empty basement.
You think the Canadien and the drummer are wearing Caveman disguises to conceal their true identities. You're a genius. The drummer, as we know, did have a motive......but so did that little French bastard who can't sing.
The plot thickens.
Joe- Now that is strange if some one pays off all the bills on time and doesn't have any outstanding balances it should be a positive thing. I know 850 is the top score and for a long time my credit score is stagnant between 740 to 760 but anyway now I don't have to pay the interest on the car loan and my savings in bank anyway don't accrue any interest worth mentioning. I also got my car title in my hands which I can sell at any time I want now.
Maybe your wife can give us pointers to achieve 800 plus score or you can write a hub about it.
Thank you, SweetiePie. Very nice of you to stop in and say hello. I'm not leaving this hub until we find the killer.
Hi countrywomen. When I got married, my wife was very young and had no credit. I got her an American Express card before we were married so she would have credit in her maiden name. She used it in moderation and always paid her bills on time. How she went above me, in her credit score I have no idea.
As far as paying off your bills and having no financial obligations is concerned, I've read somewhere that can work against your score. How, I don't know. You'd have to ask someone a lot smarter than I.
Being a responsible user of credit is a negative check mark not a big one, In the algorithm it downgrades the part of the calculation that is attributed to your willingness to pay, which has nothing to do with willingness to pay on time, it is willingness to pay interest.
As there is no real incentive to give someone credit that will pay off early. Frankly, there just is no money in it, they must be able to recoup there cost of doing business. So your score lowers a little in order to raise your interest rate slightly to offset your tendency to not be a profitable customer.
TMG
Thanks for the clarification, TMG
So it is a cult, then? I knew it!!!
without a doubt, B.T. The leader will be making the others drink the Kool-Aid before you know it.
I sure hope it's cherry flavored.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwWfU18boOI
That is the Geico Cavemen Motorcycle Commercial. I am not usually a conspiracy theorist, but in this case, all the evidence points to. Well, it points in lots of directions, but it could easily point to a Geico/FCR.com collaboration.
Yummy, B.T. My favorite!
Thanks for the link MightyMom. I hadn't yet seen that one. You're right. They are becoming more sinister. It's only a matter of time before these guys go postal, as well. They are only going to be able to take so many insulting ads from Geico.
CW, It is all about the money and who has it--or not. I thought paying off all our bills would give us a good rating too--only they tell you to have credit cards (I think it is a BIG scam) with credit balances. We got scammed by two of the biggest Gas Card Companies and it was very trying to close them--same with another big credit card company. We did get rid of them and aid them off completely and closed them. It isn't about money but the way they ran their interest rates when we were close to paying them off--they in trun raised the interest rates.
I was wondering when someone would bring up those Caveman Geico guys--those drive me crazy. I usually mute the TV when commercials come on.
MM - I think I went to high school with the Geiko cavemen....they sure look familiar. And yes, you certainly can come to Canada and cook me up some pasta! I'd love it! Especially since i don't cook, myself.
Joe - it's Canadianne, not Canadien when referring to our populace from Quebec. Say it with a heavy accent. Practise saying things like, "Dem dare guys (those guys)" and "Dat dare guy, he gonna go up da road dare (that's guy's going to go up the street)."
Too funny! I kinda love the commercial, the tune is so uhhh, catchy! yes, that's it! Not only that, if I happen to be standing, I find myself wanting to dance to the stupid thing! Yikes! Now, to get rid of it!
Hi Shirley, Thanks for the French lesson. Your version is lots easier than the one I failed in 9th grade. You might be surprised to know I have an extremely French last name-but I'm 99.75% Irish.
Thanks for stopping by Trish. That's the whole problem. You'll never be able to get it out of your mind. It will stay in your head forever, like an I Love Lucy episode-only not funny.
LOL, funny you mention I Love Lucy. There was an I Love Lucy marathon on tv today. I was disappointed because I figured it would run at least six to eight hours, but it was only three hours. I could watch those a million times and never get tired of them. She was the best!
Thanks again, Trish. I had no idea the Lucy marathon was today. I think TVLand is doing one on New Year's Eve, too. I never get sick of them, either.
Vita-meata-vegimen
yes! one of my favorites :)
I love those commercials. I may be in the shower and as soon as I hear them....forget about it. Im jumping out of the shower loofah in hand, to hear these dudes lament about their credit. I guess that makes me a die hard fan of the credit-report dudes. Hmmm....I do wonder if that is troubling, didn't think much about it until I read your hub.
Thanks for the comment, Bellemerchant. If you're addicted to the commercials....consider yourself absolutely normal:)
FOR CRYIN' OUT LOUD!!! (notice the all caps?)
I just came in here to have a peek and see whazup, didn't even listen to it and it still stuck in my head. I've been humming the damn thing for 5 minutes. I'm going to make an appointment with the bank and see if I can borrow the money for that hex removal. Oh, you're a bad one, Joe!
3/4 Irish with a very distinct French surname? Huh. How unusual. Sooo, parlez vous francais?
LOL.I hate that commercial :)
Hi Shirley. I can sing Michelle by the Beatles, but that's the extent of my speaking any Francais.
They should start doing those Free Credit commercials in French....they wouldn't bother me so much.
Thanks for the comment, Karen. You may say you hate he commercial, but deep down, you peobably love it. Everyone does :/
The songs do the job though. See, even though I could live without those songs, I accidently sing them when I'm doing some boring task.
That's what happens....your subconscious picks them up and you're stuck with them forever:) Thanks for the comment, WR.
Forever?!?
I'm afraid so, Shirley. I hear it's worse in Canada
Great! Hey, wait a minute....is that 'forever' business null and void if I fork over that $25? Is there any type of warranty or guarantee on your hex removal, by the way?
Did I say $25? That was a few days ago. Now you really need me. What's the US dollar worth in Canada now?
I'm not ashamed to admit, I really these commercials. I know it's not really them singing, but there's no denying it: the commercials are fun to watch - especially "My Credit is Whack."
Hi CW. Thanks for the comment. At last! Someone who doesn't deny liking the FCR commercials. You're in the cult!
Well, for about an hour once, a year ago, our dollar was worth more than yours. But now things are back to normal. So, that $25 is Canadian dollars? I sure hope so because if not, it'll cost me about $12,000 with the exchange rate and paypal fees, hex removal taxes, etc.
This has been a REALLY expensive week for me on HP!!! $10,000 to Mark, $5,000 to Mighty Mom and $25 to you. And let's not forget that Christmas is next week.
Wow, sure hope I've reached my AdSense payout, I'm gonna need it.
You're too funny, Shirley. I'd like to help you out, but I probably won't reach my next Adsense payout until 2012.
What do you mean "Who's going to find them?"...They've been made. The old lady is an under cover agent. In the final episode she will peal off her face and reveal that she is really Ethan Hunt of Mission Impossible. The murder of the wife had nothing to do with her credit...she knew too much.
Todd, you've cracked the case! Thanks for the comment.
Now I have that song stuck on my head, thanks
The drummer is Hugh Laurie of "House."
I cannot verify that, but ... you only get brief shots of him in the latest one where they are dressed in the medieval garb. -- Jeff
Hugh Laurie of "House." is the drummer? If that's a fact, it gives me and millions of other people more of a reason to hate these guys. The drummer guy does look a little young to be House, but I'll have to check it out a bit more closely. Thanks for the comment, Jeff:)
I hate that guy.
Maybe..........that little old lady is the lead characters domineering sugar mama and his friends are her minions ordered to ensure his poor credit rating so that he will always be her faithful sex slave. Of course her minions disposed of the wife as she clearly was the inspiration for the evil plan. welll, maybe
I'm waiting to see the bobble head on the markets. Surprised it hasn't happened yet as the lead character is the perfect living bobble head (with the exclusion of Leno of course)
I like your take on the crime, I William. Thanks for the comment. BOBBLEHEADS? Pleeeeeease, NO!
i love those ads, cant wait for the next one.
i hate those guys! The lead singer is a WANNABE! Yuck and no talent. Someone PLEASE pull the plug!
ok so... i dont mind these commercials, but u r HILARIOUS!!! liek u wouldnt expect anyone to think of it that way, but i was reading and i was liek WOW! and laughin n stuff. so yahh... nicee
i also dont mind the singer... i think hes quite adorablee!!! haha. he looks liek my friend
I think the little old lady is the FCR guy. Look at her features, look at his features. She's obviously made up to look old, doesn't look natural. I think it's him and the gag's on the viewers.
Yes those songs do haunt you, but thanks for the info, Me and my b/f and his brother all got into it over which commercial was the first one and guess what the brother was right, lol. But anywho I go to the rennisance faire, so there are people that go to those things, I just go because I like all the stuff you can buy there though, and the fact that my hair turned out quite nicely from someone doing it at the rennisance faire. But your story gave me a laugh and I'll be sure to show it to my b/f and his brother when I go there, just to prove whos right and have them read the story. Much Love
~Sabrina
Great hub, except now people from all around the world know that song, not just those in america. Thanks
Can't tell you how much I HATE those commericals &
the "freecreditreport" guy. The instant I see and hear
him, I lunge for the remote to make the pain stop.
He totally sucks.
SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!!!! the wife is NOT dead!!!!! you see her in a new commercial called "reno" shes a waitress!!! why dont you acttually learn about theese commercials before you posted this!! *wacks in head with lead sings eletric gutair (the guy who posted this not the lead singer)*
Well the wife in Reno could very well be the twin sister of the wife and she could have been in on the murder so they went to reno after they evaded the law at the ren faire and it was safe to follow her.
you know the guy lipsyncs
This is an instant channel changer. The band makes me crazy. They are so annoying.
Hilarious!
wowzers.
I wish I could become part of the commercial just to take that guitar from him and smash it over his head.
First of all let me begin by saying that your vision of the commercials were hilarious. I laughed when I was reading your hub and I couldn't stop. Second, I kind of like the commercials simply because the song became catchy and I enjoy watching their silly butts. LOL I liked your hub so much that I sent it to several friends just to put a smile on their faces. GREAT HUB!
its a good thing that dude lives in canada because if i EVER see him in L.A. I am punching him in the face.
The wife appears in he Renaissance Festival commercial again as she echoes her performance by pushing the neck of the guitar out of her way. She is not dead, but she might as well be since she is locked in a RF.
I am glad i am not the only who hates this guy! He should marry the whack job on the Progressive commercials and go on a honeymoon into the grande canyon!
Ah,Hmmmm...How very preceptive and intuitive you all are.
Although i think it's time for Joe to call-in
all those stale tin-foil hats... JOE, PLEASE..
pass out new, fresh, tin-foil hats. As it is
going to take some truly DEEP-THINKING to get
to the bones in this crime.........
We all hate them with a passion. Nobody is just able to do anything about it.
hey - I hate to spoil your synopsis but the wife you presume is dead is actually now very pregnant and at the end of the Rsn Faire commercial walks buy and pushes the neck of Eric's guitar out of her way as she is walking by. Don't you have anything to say about the mean senior citizens in the commercials? LOL!!! Perhaps it is tey who are killers! :-)
actually, in the the Renaissance fair, his wife is pregnant and passes them carrying a bucket.
this is perfect place for me! I thought I was the only one!!! I hope I never meet that guy ever!!! I would go nuts!
Thanks for creating this page!
Wrote this to the add agency, they did not respond.....
Sirs,
Just wanted to let you know that after flipping the channel every time one of your commercials came on for months that my vote for the worst TV campaign is awarded to you. The asshole who fakes the guitar playing is getting rich while your company looks foolish for paying him. Is this clown related to someone up in the executive suite?
The songs, the "story" lines, the visuals, and the smirking asshole make me want to puke every time. I even have a hard time with the fact that I am wasting my time writing this to you. This guy should take the characters from the GEICO ads and go deep sea diving with 2 minutes of air.
Respond please, I need to know why you are making us suffer through this lame campaign. By the way,without fail everyone that I have have surveyed is in total agreement with me and laughs at this ridiculous advertising boner.
Hi Lindsay T,
You ask a fair question. The only reason I subject anyone to read through this hub and promote their lame campaign, is that the only way to get the stupid songs out of my head....is to get them into yours.
Thanks for the comment :)
PS: The fake singer/guitarist has an excuse. He's Canadian.
I'm starting to wonder if you can sue them for medical reasons like you can't sleep because those stupid songs are stuck in your head. Fun hub :)
Thanks, Real Fantasy, I appreciate the comment. Maybe you should sue that evil crew. I'm sure we're not the only people in the world affected. Maybe you'll get a class action going. God luck-and please send me my cut. :)
NO...PLEASE DONT GET RID OF THIS AND!! these guys are great...i think they are funny as hell! they make the whole commercial and do a great job advertising your service!
The new guys are worse. All popular and semi-popular musical genres have been covered. It's time to put the campaign to rest.
I liked the 1st two ads fine. All subsequent are crapola. Hate 'em -- Doooooshbags all! Deaf to them and all their ilk.
goldentoad 3 years ago
You know I never watched the commercials or at least paid attention to them but I know their damn song.